self-esteem

Is the Fear of Man the Best Thing for You?

“Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.” (Proverbs 29:25)

Last week, we looked at what a snare is. It is a trap that either ends very poorly or else it ends without us being able to move. We looked at two things that are in actuality the fear of man, but we like to label things that are sin in a way that makes it seem more palatable to us. We talked about peer pressure and over commitment last week.

This week we will talk about a few more things that we would consider to be “the fear of man.”

People Pleaser

  1. Being a people pleaser – This sounds pretty tolerable to us. We just want to make other people happy. What could be so wrong as to make someone else happy? After all, doesn’t the Bible say we are to serve others? So trying to please others has to be a good thing. How would it fall into the category of “fear of man?” Have you ever done something so that the other person doesn’t get angry at you? Done whatever was necessary so you didn’t get yelled at? I have. The problem is that the cycle never ends. Rather than serving the other person, I am helping them to serve their idolatrous lusts. We talked about this topic a few weeks ago. “When someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness.” (Gal. 6:1). Our duty before God is to serve others, but not to assist them in their sin. Being a people pleaser is similar to peer pressure.

We do something because we want to be accepted by the other person. We have in essence placed our value into the hands of the other person. We see ourselves as only having value if the other person or the “in” crowd gives us value. It is easy to see how this traps us and is also very exhausting. The “crowd” has an opinion that changes, so our value also changes. Not only is it a snare, but is also very unsettling. We also talked a while ago about our identity. If your identity is rooted in who God says you are rather than in what everyone else thinks, the fear of man will no longer be an issue.

Self-Esteem

  1. Self-esteem – How many of us have either said or thought, “I have low self-esteem?” Low self-esteem usually means that I think too highly of myself. I’m too self-involved, I feel I deserve better than what I have. That one really stings. In other words, we are getting our identity from what others are thinking of us. Since it seems that others do not think too highly of us, than we feel poorly about ourselves. Do you see how this is a snare, a trap, a hindrance in our life. Our focus moves off what our identity in Christ ought to be and on to what our identity is according to the world, our culture, the people we surround ourselves with, or even what we see on T.V. and social media.

Decision Making

  1. Decision making – Do you make your decision based on what others will think of you? Do you second guess decisions because of what others might think? Are you afraid of making mistakes that will make you look bad in other people’s eyes? This looks like the last two that we have looked at. You are probably getting an idea of what the fear of man is now.

So what are you going to do about this? What do we do when we find ourselves so wrapped in what others think and try to “unwrap” ourselves? Look at Christ. Fear God. What does God say about who you are? What is identity in Christ? Focus on this rather on what everyone else in the world is saying about you. Look at what you have to give to others, not what you are going to take from them.

Be who God made you to be and claim your identity in Christ. That will give you a confidence that you have been looking for that always seemed to be out of reach. You are who God says you are in Christ. Nothing more and nothing less.

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 0 comments

You Were Bought With A Price

When my parents were kids, they used to go to the Dime Store or they also had a Five and Dime Store. With the increase in the cost of living, the Dime Store is now Dollar General or The Dollar Tree. Now if you have been in Dollar General, you know that not everything in there is $1.  However, you know that the quality of things that you find in Dollar General is not the same quality you would find if you went to Macy’s, Nordstrom’s, or William Sonoma. The quality and the cost are different at these stores.

Cost vs. Quality

We tend to equate cost with quality. If something is expensive, the general consensus is the quality is also very good.

So a piece of cookware bought at Dollar General and a piece of cookware bought at William Sonoma will not have the same cost. We would tend to value the cookware from William Sonoma higher than the cookware bought at Dollar General.

Let’s transition this.

What kind of value do you or any of us for that matter place on another human being and on ourselves?

Do we think of the cost? Or do we only value a human being if they have something valuable to offer?

What does Scripture have to say?

“For you were bought with a price…” (I Cor. 6:20).

What was that price you were bought with?

Christ laid down His life for us. He gave up His life so that we can have eternal life.

Christians that are struggling with who they are, say they have no self-worth, and they have no self-esteem, are forgetting the most important thing. Christ paid for you with His life.

“You were bought with a price.”

When we sit around and mope because we feel no one likes us, do we remember “we were bought with a price?”

When we feel sorry for ourselves because there have been other people who told us we were worthless, do we remember “we were bought with a price?”

When we feel valueless and see nothing good in ourselves, do we remember “we were bought with a price?”

Thoughts vs. Action

Too many Christians get so caught up in what others THINK of them, they forget what God has DONE for them. Wouldn’t you rather have someone show you how much they love you rather than just tell you they love you?

As we continue this series of blogs I am writing about our identity, we must remember the most important of lessons. “We were bought with a price.”

So on the day when no one will sit with you at lunch, remember you are so valuable dear Christian that “you were bought with a price.”

Or maybe it’s when others make fun of you for something, remember that you are made in God’s image and “you were bought with a price.”

Too often the world sucks us into thinking that we are only valuable if the right people like us, we wear the right clothes, drive the right car, live in the right house, have the right friends…Who actually defines what is right?

When the end of our days draws near, the friends we had in high school will be a distant memory. Unfortunately, we let those school friends impact our thinking about who we are. I have.

Rather, when the end of our days draws near, we should be focused on the God who loved us so much He sent His Son to pay the price for our sins. Why not start living this every day, right now?

“YOU WERE BOUGHT WITH A PRICE…”

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 0 comments