heart

22
Nov
2023

God’s Purpose Will Stand

“Many are the plans in the mind of a man,

But it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.”

Proverbs 19:21

 

My husband is a planner. Both of his parents are planners. My children are planners. They all have great satisfaction from putting together a plan, talking about the plan, and executing the plan. You never have to wonder what to expect when we go on vacation together or even when we will go on vacation. It is talked about well in advance of the actual vacation. All the plans are put into place way before the vacation happens. There is not a lot of fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants in our family. Plan are very important. The thought process is that the more that things are planned, the greater enjoyment there will be in the activity and everyone will know what to expect.

Planning so everyone knows what to expect and knows what to pack helps everyone to be prepared, but what happens when the activities don’t turn out quite how they were planned. What happens when the Lord has a different plan than what we did?

There are a few things to consider in this instance.

  1. God is Sovereign.

The more we trust in the sovereignty of God the better we can handle the abrupt changes that may thwart our plans. James tells us in James 4:15 “If the Lord wills, we will live and do this or that.” We should make a plan, but always understand that God is ultimately in control of the outcome of our plans. He is the One that allows change to happen in our plans. It is His purpose or His will that will ultimately be fulfilled. It is not our purpose or will that will ultimately direct our days.

This thought should also be a comfort to us as we face various decisions in life. As we seek earnestly God’s will for our lives through His Word and prayer, we can be encouraged about our choices. If our choice goes against God’s Word, we know that this is not God’s will for our lives. God has given us many wise people that we can consult with when faced with a life altering decision: our parents, our pastor, or wise mentors.

At the end of the day, if we make a choice that does not go against God’s Word, but is not the “Purpose of the Lord” He is sovereign and can change the course of our lives. No experience that happens in our life will be wasted.

  1. The circumstances of life reveals our hearts

Whenever we have a plan that does not turn out how we intended it to, God wants to use that detour of our plans to mold us to be more like Jesus. That circumstance or change of plans will be used by God to reveal what is in our hearts. When our plans do not go how we had intended, we are like a spilled glass. Whatever is in the glass will be what comes out. If we have water in our glass, water will come out. If we have selfish desires in our hearts, what will come out of our lives will be anger or despair.

Our selfish desires reveal that we are holding too tightly to our plans. Our selfish desires reveal that we know what is better for our lives, and we think that God’s plans are not the right plans.

It is hard to be “thankful in all circumstances” (I Thess. 5:18) when our perfectly laid plans are foiled, yet God says we are to be thankful in all circumstances. When we meet a foil in our plans with anger, resentment, despair, or anxiety we are in essence telling God that His plan for our lives is wrong.

So what is the answer? Plan in pencil.

Planning helps us to use our time wisely, but we must not hold so tightly to our plans that we get frustrated, angry, depressed or anxious when they do not go as we had anticipated.

God’s purposes will stand whether we want them to or not.

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 0 comments
19
Apr
2023

7 things that are an Abomination to God

When our girls were growing up, there were some things that met with instant punishment. First time obedience was a must. If we asked them to do something, they needed to do it the first time we asked and not the 10th time. Disrespect and lying were also big no-nos.  One of my daughters had a pretty rough day in the disrespect category. Another spent a long time in my bedroom until she decided to tell the truth. Those moments were pivotal in their lives. They understood the value of respect and telling the truth. As parents, there are things that require our immediate attention. These things must be corrected quickly because if they are not, the children will begin to lay down habits that will forever taint their lives.

God gave us His word so that we would know what was required of us. The things we should do and the things we should not do.

“There are six things that the LORD hates, seven that are an abomination to him; haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers.” (Proverbs 6:16-19).

In Hebrew writing there is a common literary device which is this 1+ saying. Six yeah seven. Not that they didn’t know how to count or they thought of one more thing after they started writing. Rather, it was common in the wisdom literature to draw attention to what was to follow. It also was used to draw attention to the last item in the list. The last item in the list had great value. As we look at each of these things in the list, we can see that when we do any of the first 6 things it will cause the 7th thing.

These are the things that God hates or are an abomination to Him. In other words, He absolutely abhors them.

  1. Haughty eyes

The first thing on our list is pride. The sin that took Lucifer from being an angel of light for God to an angel of darkness was his pride. Is. 14:13-15 is a quotation from Satan when he sinned. The word “I” punctuates the beginning of every sentence. “I will ascend to heaven…I will set my throne on high…I will sit on the mount of assembly…I will ascend above the heights of the clouds…I will make myself like the Most High…” The pride mentioned here is so strong that it can be seen in the person’s eyes. Their countenance portrays what is in their heart. Those that are proud will flee self-examination and will blame or attempt to destroy those that highlight their deficiencies.  Those that are proud hate failure. When they do fail, they won’t ever blame themselves. They will blame someone or something else. It is never their fault. Have you met someone who is unwilling to ever admit their fault? What about a person who refuses wise counsel? What about a person who thinks that the only person that is right is them?

  1. A Lying Tongue

Have you ever played 2 truths and a lie? Each person has to say 2 things about themselves that is true and one thing that is a lie. The lie has to be something that is believable. Have you met people who lie and are believable? You believe everything they say, only to find out later that they lied to you. Then when you confront them about their lie, they tell another lie to cover up the first lie. Many times when we are in the company of these liars, they make us feel uncomfortable. These with a lying tongue bring about confusion on the part of those that are within earshot of their lies. Do you ever feel a sense of confusion when you are in the company of someone or they make you feel uncomfortable? You need to start doing some fact checking. Not only do those that tell lies confuse others, they also are self-deceived. “…the folly of fools is deceiving.” (Prov. 14:8).

  1. Hands that Shed Innocent Blood

This seems evident that God would hate murder. After all, when one person murders another, they are taking the life of that person made in the image of God. Abortion is murder. There should be no debate about this. Yet there is. In 1919, Congress passed the 19th amendment that allowed women the right to vote. This topic has not been hotly debated in 100 years. This topic does not receive publicity. There are no longer debates regarding the legitimacy of this. Abortion, on the other hand, continues to receive much attention. We live in a fallen world that allows doctors to murder unborn babies. Those that believe the baby is a precious life made in the image of God fight for the rights of those unborn children. Those that believe it is “their body their choice” fight for the right to murder the unborn baby. God hates the shedding of innocent blood. Babies are the most innocent that there is. They cannot even put up a fight.  We must also remember the words of John in I John 3:15 “Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer…” It is not just the physical act of murder that God calls an abomination, it is also what we harbor in our hearts toward others that can be called murder.

  1. A Heart that Devises Wicked Plans

Do you ever wonder what is in your heart? Look first at how you respond to all the circumstances that happen in your life. If your response to every circumstance honors the Lord, you have a heart that honors the Lord. Our hearts in Scripture could also be called our desires. What is it you desire? What is it you want? When you lay awake at night and cannot sleep or you have a moment when your brain is not busy with work or whatever else may require brainpower, what do you find yourself thinking on? Are you dwelling on those things that glorify God like how to serve and love others? Or are you busy dwelling on how you can satisfy your selfish desires? If you are devising, scheming, or planning ways to satisfy your selfish desires, these are wicked plans. If you have to sin in order to accomplish the wicked plans your heart has devised, then you know that what you are planning is an abomination to God. Will your desires hurt someone else or will they glorify God? Take some time to consider what it is that you want. We do what we do, because we want what we want.

  1. Feet that Make Haste to Run to Evil

It is one thing to have a heart that devises wicked plans, but it heaps on our sin when we also carry out those wicked plans. These people are so eager to satisfy their desires they are hastily running to do evil.  We see this in our streets today. In so many big cities, we see people with feet that are quickly running to ransack buildings, cars, and people’s livelihood.  There is no respect of others or their possessions. We have allowed there to be mayhem and chaos. Sin does not produce peace, rather sin produces chaos and disorder. Two of our daughters are teachers. When there is peace in the classroom, it is because everyone is following the rules of the classroom. When there is chaos in the classroom, it is because the students that are creating the chaos are quickly running to evil. What surrounds your life? Peace and calm or chaos and drama? What is your heart devising that your feet are hastily running toward? Is it peace that brings glory to God or satisfaction of your selfish desires that is deceitful and brings chaos?

  1. A False Witness Who Breathes Out Lies

In the same list of seven things that God hates or are an abomination to Him, two of these mentioned include lying. Jesus calls Himself the ‘’Truth” in John 14:6. “I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life.” The Word “truth” is used over 200 times in the Bible. Lying is an affront to the character of God since one of the names of Jesus is “truth.” Jesus calls Himself the “Truth” and the person mentioned here that God says is an abomination is a false witness. These are diametrically opposed to each other.  Satan is the Father of Lies. (John 8:44). As was mentioned earlier, someone who lies will make us feel uneasy or confused because we are never sure that what they are saying is believable. God, on the other hand, and His Word are the truth. Anything that contradicts God’s Word and makes us feel uneasy needs to be thoroughly investigated. Remember, “…the folly of fools is deceiving.” (Prov. 14:8).

  1. One Who Sows Discord Among Brothers

Pride, a lying tongue, a murderer, a heart that devises wicked plans, and feet that make haste to run to evil will bring about discord. A person that possesses any of the previously mentioned six qualities will bring about discord, a disruption of peace. Relationships are valuable. God created us to have relationship with Him. He created mankind to have relationship with each other. After God created man, He created woman. “Then the Lord God said, ‘it is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” (Gen 2:18). God created us in His design for relationship. Discord in relationship began to happen because of sin. We saw this first with Adam and Eve and the blame game that happened. We can cause discord in our relationships when we possess the first six qualities mentioned in this list. Others can cause chaos in our relationships when they sow discord. Have you had a disruption in a relationship? Maybe the relationship is not what it once was. Sometimes it is our pride or lying tongues that cause a break in the relationship. Other times, it can be others that sow discord by telling lies or creating drama/chaos in another relationship. Someone else can drive a wedge in another’s relationship with someone out of jealousy or desire to control a relationship.

In Hebrew literature, the seventh thing is the culmination. Discord, strife, conflict in relationships are generally caused by the first six things on this list. Do you have a relationship that has strife or discord? Or a relationship that is not what it once was? The first thing you must do is evaluate the cause. Did you cause it? Did the other person cause it? Did a third party cause it? God does not care who caused the disruption in the relationship. He tells us that no matter who caused the disruption, we should seek to mend it. “So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” (Mt. 5:23, 24) It is always your turn to seek to mend a relationship.

 

God sent His Son Jesus to reconcile us to Himself. (Col.1:19, 20). God highly values reconciliation. If there is discord, strife, or conflict between you and someone else, do not let your pride get in the way. Go and be reconciled. Jesus gave His life. That is how highly God values reconciliation.

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 0 comments
22
Mar
2023

What Flows From Your Heart?

As our daughters grew up, we emphasized to them the value of saving their money. They would get birthday money or Christmas money, and we would encourage them to save it. We would go to the bank and they would put that money in the bank. We reminded them that they were saving their money to help pay for their college. They had a far off lofty goal that saving money would help pay for their college. When they were young, they did not quite understand what we meant by saving money for college. As they grew and matured, they began to understand what college was. We could have taken them to the store and given them the money so they could spend that money on a trinket that would not stand the test of time. There were some lessons to be learned in that exercise.

They learned saving (keeping), delayed gratification, value of money, goal-setting, planning, preparation, and wants vs. needs.

As we study the book of Proverbs, Solomon has taught us repeatedly that there is great value in listening. He encourages us to listen to those that are wise.

What is it we are supposed to do with these wise words?

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flows the springs of life.” (Proverbs 4:23)

We need to keep these words in our hearts. This doesn’t mean that we need to have God’s Word tattooed to our hearts. The word “heart” incorporates our thoughts, our emotions, and our wills. The technical term for these is our cognition, affect, and volition. All of these are considered the components that make up the word “heart” in the Bible.

Solomon is telling us in this verse that that person that we are flows or comes from our hearts. Let’s break this concept down.

There are many circumstances that happen throughout our day. With every circumstance that comes into our paths, we have a thought. With every decision that we have to make, we have a thought. We could list any number of circumstances, but every single circumstance produces a thought- even if you think that there is no thought. Many times from these thoughts an emotion is felt. Now we have a decision to make: how will I act based on this thought and/or this emotion.

The more times you respond the same way to any circumstance, the more your responses become your character.

Let’s say that you just cleaned the house, and in runs the dog with muddy paws. Without even seeming to take time to process everything, you yell at the dog and chase it until you can catch it and wipe off its dirty paws. All of this happened so quickly. A circumstance happened, you had a thought “I just spent 4 hours cleaning the house,” and then you experienced a moment of anger, followed by yelling and chasing. The next time this happens you do the same thing. Eventually, this is who you are. The angry house cleaner.

How did you get this way?

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flows the springs of life.” (Prov. 4:23).

What comes out of cup of coffee when you are bumped? Coffee.

What comes out of you, when you are bumped? In other words, when circumstances happen that disrupt what you want, what comes out of you?

The heart is our thoughts, emotions, and wills. What “flows” from you every time you are bumped?

If we do NOT store up the wise Words that God has given to us from His word as Solomon says we are to do, what flows from us WILL NOT be thoughts, words, and actions that reflect God and His Word.

If we store up the wise Words that God has given to us from His words as Solomon says we are to do, what flows from our thoughts, words, and actions WILL reflect God and His Word.

Just as our children saved or kept their money for a future goal in their lives, so we must store up or keep God’s Word in our hearts for the circumstances that are always coming across our path.

From our children’s savings’ accounts flowed money that would pay for college. From your heart will flow, what you have saved up and treasured in it.

Not sure what you are keeping in your heart? Begin to evaluate your responses to the circumstances of life. Ask yourself, “What am I wanting? What am I thinking? What am I feeling?”

Is your response honoring to the Lord? If you are not vigilant in keeping your heart filled with truths from God’s Word, you will live according to the lies of Satan.

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flows the springs of life.” (Proverbs 4:23)

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 1 comment
17
Aug
2022

Grumbling

Grumble – just the word itself sounds negative and discouraging. Grumbling is an expression of discontent or complaining. How often do we find ourselves with a feeling of discontent and we want to be sure that everyone else knows about it.

I am reading through the book of Numbers in the Bible and the grumbling of the Israelites always brings about the same response from, “what is wrong with them?” They had been slaves in Egypt, and God showed up in a big way demonstrating His power by inflicting the Egyptians with the 10 plagues and then parting the Red Sea so they walk on dry ground. What an amazing demonstration of God’s power and abilities and care for His people.

God helped the Israelites, which numbered over one million people, to walk out of Egypt with all their belongings while also being given things by the Egyptians, and cross the Red Sea on dry ground as free people. Only God could orchestrate such a grand feat. Imagine being part of that whole amazing process. Watching the 10 plagues take place before your eyes. Watching Pharaoh let the Israelites leave. Then walking between 2 walls of water on dry ground.

As if that wasn’t enough, God provided manna for the Israelites to eat. They didn’t have to work for it; they just had to go out and pick it up. All they needed to pick up was enough for the day.

There were multiple instances of the Israelites grumbling, but the one that amazes me the most is the following excerpt from Numbers 11: 4-6:

“…And the people of Israel also wept again and said, “Oh that we had meat to eat! We remember the fish we ate in Egypt that cost nothing, the cucumbers, the melons, the leeks, the onions, and the garlic. But now our strength is dried up, and there is nothing at all but this manna to look at.”

So they wanted to eat fish that cost them nothing. They were slaves. Had they forgotten that little bitty fact? The fish cost them something. It cost them their freedom.

So fish, cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions, and garlic are more valuable than freedom. At least from their current vantage point, that is what seemed valuable.

If you remember from Exodus 2:23 “During the many days the king of Egypt died, and the people of Israel groaned because of their slavery.”

When they were slaves, they weren’t happy. When they were free they weren’t happy. When they heard about the people in the Promised Land they were going to have to defeat, they grumbled. As you continue to read through Numbers, you see the Israelites grumbling. No matter the situation, they were discontent.

Being discontent with our current situation is what causes us to grumble. Discontentment is the heart attitude.  If you ever wonder what is in your heart, look at what comes out of your mouth or is seen in your actions.

No matter the situation, do you grumble and complain about it? You have a heart attitude of discontent. Other people that are around you know if you are a grumbler and a complainer. Ask them and find out what they think.

If we put off discontent, we must put something on. What is the new heart attitude we should strive to have? Thankfulness.

“For although they knew God, they did not honor Him as God or give thanks to Him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened.” (Romans 1:21).

No matter the circumstance, we are called to be thankful. When a situation happens, God is sending it your way to reveal what is in your heart. Take some time to evaluate what comes out of you in response to the circumstance.

You have a choice. What will you choose?

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 0 comments
17
Feb
2021
Think about what you think about

Think about what you think about

Last week, I wrote about Scripture memorization and the transformation that it has had in my life. The transformation that has taken place is not that I can better remember where I laid my glasses, rather it has made an alteration in my thinking.

Do you ever stop to think about you’re are thinking about?

What do you think about? Have you ever taken stock in even those fleeting thoughts that are hardly even perceptible, and yet they are? I know it seems like a strange question to wonder if you have thought about what you think about, but our thoughts impact every aspect of our lives whether we realize it or not.

Let’s consider a few things that we all at some point or other have thought. “That’s not fair.” I know we have all thought this one. Someone else gets recognition and you worked just as hard. It may have even been your hard work that this person received accolades for and there was no acknowledgement of you. What about the friends that are disrespectful to you and say things that are not true, and your actions toward them have been nothing but kind and honorable. Have we thought, “That’s not fair?” Or even “what did I do to deserve this?”

I am sure many of us have thought, “This is so hard. I can’t do this.” Whatever the obstacle is in front of us, it appears to be too difficult. It takes too much effort. Whether it is the challenging friendship, the difficult child (or puppy right now in my caseJ), a difficult spouse, or a grueling job. The list could go on, but there are many things in life that feel so overwhelming and we think, “I can’t do this.”

As we allow ourselves to think these thoughts repeatedly, they begin to impact our emotions. Our emotions begin to be a byproduct of our thoughts. Again, this is not something that we are even aware of.

What are we feeling when we experience the “That’s not fair” thought? If someone else receives recognition that we should receive, we might experience anger. What is at the root of that anger? We wanted the recognition, but what is at the root of us wanting the recognition? We feel like we deserve it. Rather than being happy for the other person that received the recognition, we want our fair share.

What about when you are in a “discussion” with someone and you begin to feel angry because they do not see your point of view on things. What is it you are thinking: “I just want them to understand what I am saying. I want them to see my point of view. I want them to agree with me. I just want to be heard.” When the other person does not see things our way, we get angry.  Did you ever stop to think about what they are trying to say? See their point of view? Actually listen to them and seek to understand with more clarity? That anger you are experiencing is rooted in you wanting your way.

When things are harder than you thought they should be and these circumstances that you are confronted with seem too hard, what are you thinking? “I can’t do this. Why are things not going the way I thought they should be?” These thoughts can lead to feelings of anxiety or depression.

So what are you thinking? What do you need to do? When you experience an emotion, you need to evaluate it. What are you thinking? What are you wanting?

Take some time to evaluate what you are thinking and what you are wanting. Begin to evaluate these emotions, and trace them back to your thoughts.

“As a man thinks in his heart, so is he.” (Prov. 23:7).

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 0 comments