fear of man

Is the Fear of Man the Best Thing for You?

“Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.” (Proverbs 29:25)

Last week, we looked at what a snare is. It is a trap that either ends very poorly or else it ends without us being able to move. We looked at two things that are in actuality the fear of man, but we like to label things that are sin in a way that makes it seem more palatable to us. We talked about peer pressure and over commitment last week.

This week we will talk about a few more things that we would consider to be “the fear of man.”

People Pleaser

  1. Being a people pleaser – This sounds pretty tolerable to us. We just want to make other people happy. What could be so wrong as to make someone else happy? After all, doesn’t the Bible say we are to serve others? So trying to please others has to be a good thing. How would it fall into the category of “fear of man?” Have you ever done something so that the other person doesn’t get angry at you? Done whatever was necessary so you didn’t get yelled at? I have. The problem is that the cycle never ends. Rather than serving the other person, I am helping them to serve their idolatrous lusts. We talked about this topic a few weeks ago. “When someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness.” (Gal. 6:1). Our duty before God is to serve others, but not to assist them in their sin. Being a people pleaser is similar to peer pressure.

We do something because we want to be accepted by the other person. We have in essence placed our value into the hands of the other person. We see ourselves as only having value if the other person or the “in” crowd gives us value. It is easy to see how this traps us and is also very exhausting. The “crowd” has an opinion that changes, so our value also changes. Not only is it a snare, but is also very unsettling. We also talked a while ago about our identity. If your identity is rooted in who God says you are rather than in what everyone else thinks, the fear of man will no longer be an issue.

Self-Esteem

  1. Self-esteem – How many of us have either said or thought, “I have low self-esteem?” Low self-esteem usually means that I think too highly of myself. I’m too self-involved, I feel I deserve better than what I have. That one really stings. In other words, we are getting our identity from what others are thinking of us. Since it seems that others do not think too highly of us, than we feel poorly about ourselves. Do you see how this is a snare, a trap, a hindrance in our life. Our focus moves off what our identity in Christ ought to be and on to what our identity is according to the world, our culture, the people we surround ourselves with, or even what we see on T.V. and social media.

Decision Making

  1. Decision making – Do you make your decision based on what others will think of you? Do you second guess decisions because of what others might think? Are you afraid of making mistakes that will make you look bad in other people’s eyes? This looks like the last two that we have looked at. You are probably getting an idea of what the fear of man is now.

So what are you going to do about this? What do we do when we find ourselves so wrapped in what others think and try to “unwrap” ourselves? Look at Christ. Fear God. What does God say about who you are? What is identity in Christ? Focus on this rather on what everyone else in the world is saying about you. Look at what you have to give to others, not what you are going to take from them.

Be who God made you to be and claim your identity in Christ. That will give you a confidence that you have been looking for that always seemed to be out of reach. You are who God says you are in Christ. Nothing more and nothing less.

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 0 comments

What is the Fear of Man?

“Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.” (Proverbs 29:25)

Have you ever considered what the fear of man is? We talk about trusting in the Lord and fearing the Lord quite often in our everyday Christian and church circles, but do we talk about the fear of man?

What exactly is the fear of man? This verse says that the fear of man is a snare. Do you know what a snare is? It’s a trap. A snare is usually a noose type structure that is meant to catch its prey either by its foot or around its neck. Around its foot would cause it to not be able to move but still be alive. A noose, well we know that doesn’t ever end well.

So what is the fear of man that it either causes us to be unable to move or possibly ending very poorly? Here is a list of all the things we use in our current culture that are really the fear of man. I will try to explain them as I go so you understand the connection.

  1. Peer Pressure- Most of us know what peer pressure is and have even seen its effects on people. We dress a certain way. We say certain things. We do things because our peers are doing it. We try to “keep up with the Jones.’” Generally, these things are not beneficial to us or to those around us. Can you see how peer pressure can be a snare that ends in entrapment? Someone who begins to drink alcohol and drinks with friends begins to notice the draw of wanting more. No longer is drinking a thing to do with friends, it becomes a way to cope with the stress of life. This can lead to addiction and even death. This may be an extreme example of peer pressure, but what about the pressure to share a secret that you know because you are with a group of people that is gossiping. Not wanting to be left out, you also share a secret that would hurt the other person’s reputation or character. Now you have damaged someone else and have drug them into the snare of your weakness of peer pressure.
  2. Over Commitment – do you say “yes” when wisdom would indicate that you say “no?” How many times have you said “yes” to something at work or at church because you wanted to make sure everyone thought highly of you. I love the thought “when you say ‘yes’ to one thing you are saying ‘no’ to something else.” When my children were young, I would say “yes” to so many things. They were always good things, but in saying “yes” to all of those good things it took a toll on our family. Now I try to get input from my husband, daughters, parents, or friends before saying “yes.” I spend time in prayer regarding my decision first and foremost. I don’t want to commit to something because I want others to think highly of me, rather I want to commit to things because they would use the talents and abilities God has given me to serve others and glorify God.

In my effort to keep these posts something that is a quick read, I must conclude here and tell you to tune in next week. As you ponder these two points this week, remember that when we fear man it is a snare, but when we fear God it will keep us safe. Would you rather be in a trap that will restrict you or cause terrible consequences or fear the God of the universe who wants to keep us safe?

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 0 comments