children

Unbind the Folly Through Training

“Train up a child in the way he should go;

Even when he is old he will not depart from it.

Folly is bound up in the heart of a child,

But the rod of discipline drives it far from him.”

Proverbs 22:6, 15

 

Children! Sunday (January 20, 2024) was Sanctity of life Sunday. We had a baby dedication at church on Sunday morning and ten families dedicated their babies to the Lord. It was a beautiful sight to see. Children are a blessing from the Lord! This dedication service is more for the parents than it is for the children. This ceremony is a commitment by the parents that they will “raise up their children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” (Eph. 6:4b). Eph. 6:4b is a command given to us by the Lord that takes time, prayer, and patience to follow.

The definition of a Proverb is a short sometimes pithy saying that states a general truth or piece of advice. So our Proverb today gives us a piece of advice and a general truth.

Let’s start by looking at Proverbs 22:15 “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child.” Folly is the same thing as foolishness. Folly is a lack of good sense. Foolishness is lacking good judgement. A child has many things to learn. They need to be taught how to read, write, do math problems, understand chemistry, how to drive a car, etc. They also need to be taught that the stove is hot and we should not touch it. A road is a dangerous place and we need to watch out for cars. Frozen ice may or may not be safe to walk on (there are still adults that are learning this lesson.)

From a biblical perspective, we have to teach our children how to live their lives according to God’s Word. Children do not have to be taught to serve their own interests. Rather, they have to be taught to serve others, deny themselves, and worship God. Our natural inclination is to love and serve ourselves because we are all born with a sin nature (Rom 3:23). Sin is luring and seductive telling us that if we satisfy our desires, we will be happy.

A child does not have to be taught not to share their toys, rather they must be taught to share. A child does not have to be taught disobedience, rather they must be taught obedience. Selfishness, disobedience, lying, stealing, pride, etc. is folly and as the Proverb says it is bound up in the heart of a child. We as parents have to do the work of unbinding this folly that is in their hearts. We must work at training them and teaching them that even though their selfishness satisfies for a moment, it will not bring long term satisfaction.

How many times do we ever want just one cookie or one candy bar? We have one and think that will satisfy, but it only feeds our thirst and desire for more. Why do people struggle with addictions? Because one is never enough. One never satisfies.

Training takes time, energy, focus, intentionality, prayer, Bible reading, and modeling. If we want our children to be kind, we must teach them kindness and also demonstrate kindness. If we want our children to have self-control, control their anger, and be gentle, then we must demonstrate self-control and gentleness. If we want our children to follow the Lord, then we must demonstrate so they can see us reading God’s Word and spending time in prayer. We could add many more things to the list, but you get the picture.

Our children’s natural inclination is to follow their selfishness. So is ours for that matter. We must be diligent trainers. If we allow our children to follow their natural bent, that is the kind of person they will be when they are adults. We have been given the responsibility to train our children in the Lord.

We all want a guarantee that if we do the right things we will have perfect children. There are many examples in the Bible of godly parents having ungodly children and ungodly parents having godly children. So what do we do as parents?

We will one day stand before God and give an account of how we lived our lives and how we raised our children. What our children do as adults is something they will have to give an account of before God. As parents we must live our lives to the glory of God, our children have the same responsibility. How we trained them while they were under our care is what we must give an account for, how they live as adults is what they must give an account for.

Be diligent in training your children and unbinding the folly that is in their hearts.

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 2 comments

Where are your eyes?

As a Mom, there are so many different places we need to keep focused. We watch our children grow through different stages, and as they do they need us to focus on different things. We must keep our eyes on a myriad of things. As babies, we make sure they get enough sleep, enough to eat, stay healthy, stay warm or cool, get enough stimulation but not too much.

Then they start moving. First, they are rolling over, then scooting, then crawling, and then very proudly walking. It was so nice in those early days of motherhood to set the baby down and know that when we looked back at them, they were still in the same spot. Once they start moving, we gain eyes in the back of our heads. If we did not, there would sure be many more accidents. Those eyes in the back of our heads are certainly a unique and necessary feature for every mom.

I believe another very important place for us as moms to keep our eyes is on the Lord. II Chronicles 20 talks about Jehoshaphat’s prayer to the Lord when he was threatened by more than one nation coming against him and the children of Israel. There was an invasion of more than one enemy coming against Israel and Jehoshaphat cried out to the Lord, “We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you.” (II Chron. 20:12).

I don’t know about you, but I have been at this place in my life more than once. I did not know what to do.

It seems there are only 2 choices. Have our eyes on the Lord or not.

In the midst of the crises, in the mist of the storm, in the midst of the peace after the storm; where are our eyes?

Think about our children. We watch them and vigilantly keep track of them to make sure they are safe and taken care of. When they learn to crawl and walk, it is hard work for them. They try, they fall, they try, and then they crawl and then they walk.

Do we keep our eyes on them? Do we stop the learning process or just make sure they don’t tumble down a flight of stairs? We don’t stop watching them, and they don’t stop trying.

What do those sweet children of ours do when they fall and they hurt themselves? They have their eyes on us. They know that we are there and will comfort them even through the pain of the scratched knee.

When Jehoshaphat as the leader of this country did not know what to do, “his eyes (and those of the people) were on the Lord.”

We must teach our children that through the good days and through the days of crises, we must keep our eyes on the Lord. He has not taken His eyes off us. Why do we take our eyes off the Lord in the midst of the crises? Do we really think that we can solve the crises better than the Creator of the World?

I don’t know where you are or what situation you are in.  You may feel as if all the enemies of the world are pointing their swords toward you, and you don’t know what to do. Do what Jehoshaphat did, “We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you.” (II Chron. 20:12)

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 1 comment