Month: June 2023

Safety from Falls

Where there is no guidance, a people falls,

But in an abundance of counselors there is safety

Proverbs 11:14

One of the opportunities that I have had the privilege to be a part of is raising puppies for Leader Dogs for the Blind. We have had the opportunity to raise 5 dogs and 2 of them have gone on to assist those that are vision impaired have more freedom as these dogs have become the “eyes” for these individuals. It was a wonderful opportunity to be a part of this very worthwhile endeavor. Many have asked us if we will do this again, and I always answer that I don’t know. I would love to do it again, but life has been full.

These dogs are guides for people that are vision impaired so that they do not fall. Our verse today from Proverbs is not talking about the physical act of walking, but it is referring to the living of one’s life. When we live life, there are many decisions that one must make as we go through life. There is not one decision that is made in life that there is not someone who has an opinion about that decision.

We live in the information age. We can “Google” anything. The word “google” refers to 10 to the 100th power. In other words, an unfathomable number. When we “google” something we get an unfathomable number of hits that come up with a solution to our “problem.”

Scripture is not referring to us googling something to find the answer to our problem. It is also not referring to a dog guiding us when we cannot see.

Scripture is referring to wise people. When we are faced with a decision in life, who do we go to in order to assist us in making a wise choice? Our verse says that when we have a decision to make and we do not seek wise guidance in said decision, we fall. When a blind person does not heed the direction of their guide dog, they will fall. What happens when we fall? We are injured. We skin up our knees or break a bone.

So it is when we have a decision to make and we do not seek wise counsel, we suffer some type of consequence for a poor choice. There are some major choices in life that are made and it is the wise person that seeks wise counsel in relation to these choices. How many times have we heard someone say, “I prayed about this and felt like the Lord was directing me…” Yet, when we look at Scripture we can see a clear directive that contradicts the choice the person was making. They were not seeking the Lord’s direction, they were seeking their own desires and put the stamp “I prayed about it” on their decision.

I recently listened to the book “The Power of Who” by Bob Beaudine, and in it he talks about having a “personal board of directors.” This board of directors is your personal abundance of counselors that this Proverb refers to. So often we take the path that leads to failure because this path is well worn and often this path offers the least amount of resistance in the moment. Many times we cannot see the forest for the trees as the famous saying goes. We need others that can see the path of our lives more clearly than we can see it. They have lived life longer than we have. Our board of directors usually knows us better than we know ourselves. Many of the decision we make involve our emotions, and our emotions are good at playing tricks on us.

So who should make up or “board of directors” or our “abundance of counselors?”

  1. Dad/Mom- who knows you better than your parents? They raised you and most parents have their children’s best interest at heart. They know things about you that you do not know about yourself. They see you and know your strengths and your weaknesses. They have lived life longer than you have and know you best. Your parents always have an opinion about the choices you make and as a general rule they would love to give you their opinion. Ask them for it and then listen to what they have to say. I don’t always like the things my dad has to say, but he has proven to be wise throughout my life the more humble I have gotten in listening to him. “Honor your father and mother (this is the first commandment with promise), that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” (Eph. 6:2, 3). When you honor your parents, God promised that it would go well with you. Do you want life to go well? Honor your parents and seek their wisdom. (Bob Beaudine said this was #1 in his book “The Power of Who”)
  2. Mate – If you are married, your mate also knows you well. Not only this, but every decision you make effects your mate. What job you take, how you raise the children, where to live, what car or house to buy, etc. Many decisions that we make in life effect our mates. We should always seek their counsel when making a decision and seek to make these major decision together. When a couple is married, they can together go their parents and seek their counsel for a decision that needs to be made.
  3. Your Pastor – what a blessing it is to be a part of a church family that helps us walk through life. Your pastor, Sunday school teacher, or wise mentor would love to give you wise counsel in the decisions that you make. They have spent much time counseling people and they have seen good choices and poor choices. These people will seek to give advice according God’s Word.
  4. Friends – our friends also know us well. They may have recently gone through a similar situation so they can tell you what they did and the impact that decision had on them.

From all of these people, we have the opportunity to learn from their mistakes. How many of us wish we could have a “do-over?” I do. There are many things I wish I could “do-over.” So when someone asks me my opinion about something, I am going to first go to Scripture for principles that will guide the decision, and then I will draw on my bank of experiences and share the things that I did well or the things I wish I could have done differently.

Wise is the person who willingly seeks advice and counsel from others. Foolish is the person who makes a rash life altering decision without seeking the advice of others. Humility is a necessary ingredient in seeking the advice of others. For in so doing we will either fall or be safe.

The guide dogs I raised have a very valuable person at the end of the leash. They have great responsibility and will lead their person to fall or be safe. Will you choose to seek wise counsel in the decisions you make? Will you allow your “abundance of counselors” or “board of directors” to assist you in making wise choices? Safety or injury is at the end of the line. Don’t be fooled into thinking that bad things won’t happen to you, or there is no immediate crash after a decision. Some decisions do not reap the negative consequences until later in life.

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 0 comments

Secure or Crooked?

Whoever walks in integrity walks securely,

But he who makes his ways crooked will be found out.

Proverbs 10:9

Have you heard the saying, “A man is only as good as his word?” In other words, what a man says must be backed up by his actions. When a man tells a woman that he loves her, she expects to see it backed up in his actions. If he does not pay attention to her, show her kindness, honor, and respect, then we would wonder if he truly loved her. When a woman says she loves her children, but fails to provide for their basic needs we would wonder about the sincerity of her words. She never hugs them, encourages them, or spends time with them, we would wonder about her love for them.

Our verse in Proverbs talks about walking. This does not mean the activity of walking, though that is a good activity. The word walk actually means how we live. If we live with integrity, we will be secure in our lives. This security is not when you are locked safely inside your house or car, or riding in the Presidents bullet proof Limo with secret service all around you.  The security this is talking about is the security of your reputation. When you say something, everyone around you knows that what you say has happened or will happen. When we live our lives truthfully and honestly, we are walking on ground that is firm. It is secure.

Integrity means being honest and having high moral principles no matter where a person is or who they are with. A person with integrity provides a steadiness and a secureness to the relationship. The trust in the relationship is never broken since they never give anyone a reason to doubt them. They are dependable and without any doubt, and when you are in a relationship with this person you know you can count on them. Any relationship with the person that has impeccable integrity provides a security to the relationship that is unwavering.

This is the kind of love and relationship we have with our God if we are a follower of Jesus. His love and care for us is unshakeable. No matter what we do, God will always love us. He loved us first (I John 4:19) and will never stop loving us. (Rom. 8:35).

I am reminded of the story of the prodigal son (Luke 15:11-32). Even though the son turned his back on his dad, the son knew the integrity of his father and knew that even though he had treated his father poorly their relationship was secure.

Our reputation goes before us and behind us. People know what kind of a person you are by your reputation. One who walks in a way that demonstrates honest and wholesome character with a high degree of morality, is one who provides a security and a dependability of relationship.

The converse of this person is the one whose way is crooked. In other words, this person lies and is always seeking to cover their tracks. This person is the flagrant opposite of the person with a high moral and wholesome character. Having a relationship with this person is like walking on quick sand or in a completely dark forest. There is no security or safety. You are never quite sure what to expect and the relationship always leaves you with a feeling of being unsettled. We have seen this happen multiple times (actually multiple multiplied by multiple times) on the news to politicians, actors/actresses, or others. It seems that these people are always living life with one eye forward and one eye watching their back always wondering when the truth will actually surface. They tell lies to cover up the last lies. Then they don’t remember what the lie was that they told. “Be sure your sins will find you out.” (Num. 32:23). It seems that these people would learn that a thing can never be covered up. The truth will always be found out, yet the deceivers are themselves so deceived they think that they will be the one to pull the wool over someone’s eyes.

The crooked ways are always found out and the truth is always revealed.

When my girls were young, they would always get in more trouble for lying. I wanted them to understand how significant this was in their lives. A genuine relationship cannot be had with a crooked person. These relationships always leave us in turmoil and confusion. We are never sure which way is up. A relationship with this person is filled with uncertainty and uneasiness.

It is important to evaluate the relationships we are in. if you find yourself with a person of honest character with a high regard for the truth. Your relationship with that person is secure. If you find yourself in a relationship with a person that leaves you feeling uneasy and in turmoil, “leave the presence of a fool.” (Prov. 14:7). If you are married to such a person that leaves you uneasy or in turmoil, seek Biblical counsel. You need help and so does the person you are married to.

We can choose who we want to be… a person with honest integrity or the fool that leads us down a crooked path.

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 1 comment