Month: March 2023

22
Mar
2023

What Flows From Your Heart?

As our daughters grew up, we emphasized to them the value of saving their money. They would get birthday money or Christmas money, and we would encourage them to save it. We would go to the bank and they would put that money in the bank. We reminded them that they were saving their money to help pay for their college. They had a far off lofty goal that saving money would help pay for their college. When they were young, they did not quite understand what we meant by saving money for college. As they grew and matured, they began to understand what college was. We could have taken them to the store and given them the money so they could spend that money on a trinket that would not stand the test of time. There were some lessons to be learned in that exercise.

They learned saving (keeping), delayed gratification, value of money, goal-setting, planning, preparation, and wants vs. needs.

As we study the book of Proverbs, Solomon has taught us repeatedly that there is great value in listening. He encourages us to listen to those that are wise.

What is it we are supposed to do with these wise words?

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flows the springs of life.” (Proverbs 4:23)

We need to keep these words in our hearts. This doesn’t mean that we need to have God’s Word tattooed to our hearts. The word “heart” incorporates our thoughts, our emotions, and our wills. The technical term for these is our cognition, affect, and volition. All of these are considered the components that make up the word “heart” in the Bible.

Solomon is telling us in this verse that that person that we are flows or comes from our hearts. Let’s break this concept down.

There are many circumstances that happen throughout our day. With every circumstance that comes into our paths, we have a thought. With every decision that we have to make, we have a thought. We could list any number of circumstances, but every single circumstance produces a thought- even if you think that there is no thought. Many times from these thoughts an emotion is felt. Now we have a decision to make: how will I act based on this thought and/or this emotion.

The more times you respond the same way to any circumstance, the more your responses become your character.

Let’s say that you just cleaned the house, and in runs the dog with muddy paws. Without even seeming to take time to process everything, you yell at the dog and chase it until you can catch it and wipe off its dirty paws. All of this happened so quickly. A circumstance happened, you had a thought “I just spent 4 hours cleaning the house,” and then you experienced a moment of anger, followed by yelling and chasing. The next time this happens you do the same thing. Eventually, this is who you are. The angry house cleaner.

How did you get this way?

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flows the springs of life.” (Prov. 4:23).

What comes out of cup of coffee when you are bumped? Coffee.

What comes out of you, when you are bumped? In other words, when circumstances happen that disrupt what you want, what comes out of you?

The heart is our thoughts, emotions, and wills. What “flows” from you every time you are bumped?

If we do NOT store up the wise Words that God has given to us from His word as Solomon says we are to do, what flows from us WILL NOT be thoughts, words, and actions that reflect God and His Word.

If we store up the wise Words that God has given to us from His words as Solomon says we are to do, what flows from our thoughts, words, and actions WILL reflect God and His Word.

Just as our children saved or kept their money for a future goal in their lives, so we must store up or keep God’s Word in our hearts for the circumstances that are always coming across our path.

From our children’s savings’ accounts flowed money that would pay for college. From your heart will flow, what you have saved up and treasured in it.

Not sure what you are keeping in your heart? Begin to evaluate your responses to the circumstances of life. Ask yourself, “What am I wanting? What am I thinking? What am I feeling?”

Is your response honoring to the Lord? If you are not vigilant in keeping your heart filled with truths from God’s Word, you will live according to the lies of Satan.

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flows the springs of life.” (Proverbs 4:23)

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 1 comment
15
Mar
2023

When Solomon Speaks…

As a child, I grew up in a small town. We had three different channels on T.V. maybe 4 on a good day. I was the remote control. My dad would have me stand at the T.V. and change the channel for him. For that matter, I was also the garage door opener. I can remember my dad falling asleep on the couch watching something on T.V. that I didn’t want to watch, so I would get up and slowly turn down the volume of what he was watching. Then I would change the channel and slowly turn up the volume. It was my finest hour if I could watch a show I wanted to watch and he remained asleep. Remember, there were only 3-4 channels to watch so the choices weren’t that great.

There is one commercial that I still remember to this day. It ran for about 15 years. The commercial was generally set with a crowd of people. One person would lean in as if to tell a secret to another person, and say “My broker is E.F. Hutton, and E. F. Hutton says.” When the actor said E.F Hutton a hush would fall over the crowd and everyone would stop what they were doing and lean in so they could hear the financial advice that came from E.F. Hutton. We never would hear what E.F. Hutton was advising, but we certainly knew that whatever it was, it must be worth listening to.

As I have been studying and writing these blogs on Proverbs, I have been reminded of the E.F Hutton commercial. Each chapter that we have looked at so far keeps reminding us to listen. Proverbs 4:1 starts with “hear.” Solomon doesn’t tell us over and over to talk. Rather, he tells us to hear. He tells us to hear, to be attentive.

Solomon, who wrote Proverbs, was the son of King David and Bathsheba. King David is said to be a “man after God’s own heart.” (I Sam. 13:14). King David who killed a lion and a bear with his slingshot as a boy, and then killed the mighty giant Goliath. King David who humbly served King Saul and would do nothing to hurt “God’s anointed.” (I Sam 24:10). King David who was anointed to be King by God and Samuel, but he would not take the throne from Saul. He honored Saul, even though Saul was not honorable.

This same David was the father of Solomon. Was David perfect? No. He committed some sins that most of us would count as big bad sins. Yet, Solomon saw the value of listening to his father. “When I (Solomon) was a son with my father (King David), tender (meaning he was young) the only one in the sight of my mother (Bathsheba). He (King David) taught me and said to me (Solomon), ‘Let your heart hold fast my words; keep my commandments, and live. Get wisdom; get insight; do not forget, and do not turn away from the words of my mouth.’” (Proverbs 4:3-5).

The beauty of this whole thing is that Solomon valued what he learned from his father so much, he taught it to his son. “Hear, my son, and accept my words.” (Prov. 4:10).

Imagine with me being in the court of Solomon. There is conversation going on around in Solomon’s court. Then Solomon clears his throat and says to his son, “Son, be attentive, Get wisdom; get insight; do not forget, and do not turn away from the words of my mouth. Do not forsake her, and she will keep you; love her, and she will guard you. The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom, and whatever you get, get insight. Prize her highly, and she will exalt you; she will honor you if you embrace her. She will place on your head a graceful garland; she will bestow on you a beautiful crown.” (Proverbs 4:5-9).

Solomon is telling his son that in order to have the honor that his father David had, “he needed to listen to what he had to say, and do not forsake his teaching.” (Prov. 4:2).

In other words, when Solomon speaks, everyone listens.

There is nothing more sweet to a parent than to hear their children repeat the things that they have heard their parents say. Imagine how proud David would have been to know that Solomon was quoting him to his son. When we teach and live out what we have been taught, we know that it has taken root.

In order to be wise, Solomon says we must listen. In order to listen, we must be humble. Those that were surrounding the actor quoting E.F. Hutton knew that what E.F Hutton says was worth listening to. This requires humility to realize that you don’t know everything and need to learn from those who do.

“I have taught you the way of wisdom; I have led you in the paths of uprightness. When you walk, your steps will not be hampered, and if you run, you will not stumble.” (Proverbs 4:11, 12)

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 0 comments
08
Mar
2023

Principles

Have you had a conversation with someone, and you did not see to eye on the situation? It could be a situation with a family member, friend, co-worker, or a boss. What about a decision you needed to make and there were multiple options to choose from, maybe there were only two options to choose from?

Life is about circumstances and choices. We are constantly inundated with circumstances and choices.

As we continue to look at Proverbs, we continue to see throughout the book that making wise choices and responding wisely in the midst of each circumstance will bring us blessings and peace. Wisdom is essentially living according to godly ways and godly principles. We have two choices in how to live life: wisely or foolishly.

How many times have we struggled to make a decision or struggled in how to respond in the midst of a circumstance? If we are seeking to follow God’s principles, our first step is to follow James 1:5 “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given to him.”

What has God given us to help us in respond wisely in all circumstances and make godly choices? The first thing we must follow is His Word. Does God’s Word give us the answer to our question? It may not specifically tell us what job to take, what church to attend, what person to marry, who to become friends with, or where to go on vacation; but it gives us very direct principles to answer these questions.

II Peter 1:3 “His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence.”

How do we know how to live a “life of godliness?”  “Through the knowledge of Him who called us” (II Peter 1:3.

Do you seek God’s Word and seek to find principles that pertain to your decision or circumstance or do you seek the option that you think in the moment will make you happy?

We are in the second half of Proverbs 3, and in it there are three principles that will help us to life a life of godliness.

  1. Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it. (Prov. 3:27)

The verses that follow (Prov. 3:28-32) tell us not to turn someone away when you can be of assistance, do not plan to do evil against another, do not strive with someone for no reason, do not envy another, and do not be devious.

How often do we treat others through the lens of our own selfishness? We want something and we want the other person to provide it for us. We want something and someone else is getting in the way of what we want. We treat others selfishly rather than “treat others as you want to be treated.” (Mt. 7:12)

  1. To the humble he gives favor (Proverbs 3: 34)

C.S. Lewis said that humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less. When we are humble, we realize our own inadequacies and weaknesses. We realize that someone may be better able to accomplish the task. Humility is allowing someone else to get the praise for something and not trying to steal the recognition from them. Humility is realizing that you don’t always have the answers and need to seek wise counsel.  Three times in Proverbs 3 Solomon says “my son,”  reminding the reader that often our parents know us better than any other person and know us better than we know ourselves. It is a wise parent that will take their child to God’s Word to assist them in making a decision or navigate a circumstance. So often we see children buck at the teaching of their parents because they want to do it in the famous words of Frank Sinatra “My Way.” Do you want favor? Solomon says in order to gain favor, we must be humble.

  1. The wise will inherit honor, but fools get disgrace. (Proverbs 3:35).

Would you rather live a life with honor or disgrace? Since we are made in the image of God (Gen.1:27), God has given us the play book on how to live life. The play book is His Word. He has told us repeatedly that living a life of wisdom will bring about honor, but being foolish will be disgraceful. When we see someone that explodes in anger, is always “negative Nancy,” goes to a substance for comfort, always looks out for their own interests, dishonors God, or dishonors their parents, we see someone who is foolish. Have you seen these people in real life? Do you see the fruits of their wisdom or the fruits of their foolishness? Are they people that are honorable that you want to spend time with or are they people that are a disgrace.

The book of Proverbs is a book of principles. Solomon was letting us know that as he observed life this is what he saw. He saw that the typical wise person was honorable and the typical foolish person was a disgrace. The typical humble person received favor. The typical wise person offered to help those in need.

When faced with a circumstance or a choice to make, what will you do? You must seek God’s Word for a principle or command to follow in making that choice. No matter what the choice, there is a godly principle to help us navigate the way wisely.

Posted by ddykema5@gmail.com in The Seasons of Motherhood, 2 comments
01
Mar
2023

Peace, Favor, Straight Paths, Healing, and Refreshment

I have two favorite Proverbs, Proverbs 3 and Proverbs 31.  I often pray Proverbs 3: 1-9 for people, but my aspirations is to be like the Proverbs 31 woman. Proverbs 3 lived out in life is certainly an avenue to become like the Proverbs 31 woman.

I like prescriptions and procedures. Don’t you? When you are reading an article or a blog, are we not all drawn to the steps toward a certain goal? I typed into Google “steps to a new you.” The 1st three listed were “5 steps to a new you,” 10 steps to a new you,” and “15 steps to a new you.”  I would much prefer only to have to do 5 steps and I can become a new me.

Proverbs is like a handbook that tells us how to be wise and not to be foolish. Proverbs is the steps we need to be wise, in essence to be a new you. If you do not follow what Proverbs says about becoming wise, then you will be foolish.

Do you want a new you? Do you want a better you? Do you want a you that brings glory to God? Let’s see what Proverbs 3 says about how to be that person. What we are going to see may seem repetitive to what we have already seen in Proverbs 1, 2. The thing about repetition is that we know that if the same thing is said over and over again, we know it must be important.

“My son (or daughter), do not forget my teaching, and let your heart keep my commandments. For length of days and years of life and peace they will add to you” (Proverbs 3:1, 2).

Let’s look at four things that we can have when we follow God’s path for our lives.

  1. Long and peaceful life

Do you want a long life? Do you want a peaceful life? According to Proverbs 3:1 in order to have a long and peaceful life, we need to remember and keep or live out the wise teaching God has given us: wisdom in His word, wisdom from wise parents, and wisdom from those that have lived life according to God’s Word.

  1. Favor and good success in the sight of God and man

According to Proverbs 3:2 steadfast love and faithfulness will provide us favor and good success. There are many relationships that have conflict. There is not a day that goes by that many of us do not experience conflict with family, friends, co-workers, customers, etc. How do we avoid these points of conflict or how do we effectively work through them? Show love to others and be faithful to God’s Word. If we live in relationship with others selfishly, we will have many points of conflict.

I am currently reading a book about being a peacemaker. (The Peacemaker by Ken Sande). He talks about four principles that we need to use in the midst of a conflict.

  1. Glorify God
  2. Get the log out of your own eye
  3. Gently restore
  4. Go and be reconciled

These principles are the principles that Solomon was trying to help us understand in this Proverb. How do we have favor and good success with God and man? Have steadfast love and be faithful. In other words, show others love and be faithful to God and His word.

  1. He will make straight your paths

How do we have straight paths? “Trust in the Lord with your whole heart” When we trust in the Lord and various events happen in life, no matter how difficult they are, we trust the Lord and “do not lean on our own understanding.” (Proverbs 3:5). So many circumstances happen in our lives and we look at these things and think, “why did God let this happen to me? This isn’t fair. I didn’t deserve this to happen to me. I have been obeying God’s word and living life according to what God has to say, and now this happened to me. I have been so kind to this person and showing them such love, and they treat me like this. I don’t deserve that. Why did this accident happen? Why this diagnosis?”

You could add so many more things to this list of things that don’t seem fair. What God wants us to understand is that even though it seems like difficult things happen, when “we trust God and we acknowledge Him in all of our ways,”  “our path will be straight.”  What we want to do is “lean on our own understanding.” Leaning on our own understanding, makes the way that we are on crooked. In our own understanding the way does seem crooked, but when we trust God our path is straight. Every circumstance that comes into our lives is meant to reveal what is in our hearts. These circumstances are meant to reveal the kind of person that we are.

  1. “It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones” (Proverbs 3:8)

Have you ever not felt well, especially your stomach, related to stress or anxiety or depression? Many times we have our stomach in knots or feel nauseated because of the things that are happening in our lives. We are trying to solve the problems that we have or deal with the difficult relationships that we have or make a decision that we need to make based on our own understanding, based on our human wisdom. The fear of the Lord is the main theme of the book of Proverbs. The opposite of fearing the Lord is being wise in our own eyes. If we do not fear the Lord in all areas of our lives, we are being wise in our own eyes.

What happens when we are “wise in our own eyes?”  We seek out people that will agree with us on a decision, a problem, or how we handle a difficult relationship and they will give us the same advice that we want to hear. We consider this to be validation of what we think. What about when we are trying to make a decision or solve a problem and we pray about it, and decide we have peace from the Lord and it coincides with what we want? Does this peace we are experiencing actually come from the Lord?

Ken Sande in the Peacemaker says “You won’t be helped by people who are likely to tell you what they think you want to hear (II Tim 4:3). Therefore, be sure you turn to people who will love you enough to be honest with you.” (p. 40)

How many people say that their life verse is Proverbs 3:5, 6 and yet when you look at their life, you don’t say a life of faith in God? Rather you see a life that is living by their own understanding and wisdom. If you are not sure the path you are on, seek out wise people and ask them. Don’t ask those that will agree with you, ask those who love you enough to be honest with you. Once you are on the right path you will experience peace, favor, straight paths, and healing.

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